Friday, September 30th, 2016

Put family ahead of self

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Interesting reaction to my column last Thursday in the Waukesha Freeman, “Who is really hurting marriage?” I’ll probably re-visit the topic in the near future. The following is a letter to the editor that appeared in today’s Waukesha Freeman:

Putting family ahead of self will strengthen marriage

To the editor: I totally agree with James Wigderson’s article (“Who is really hurting marriage?,” Thursday), but need to add some thoughts. Although women initiating affairs has risen, it is still primarily the man who ends up destroying his family by getting involved with another woman. It is sad that in our culture, we continuously elect and re-elect leaders that exhibit no moral character. Why? Our culture has slipped. Understand that no one in this world is perfect, and never will be. Even men high up in their Christian beliefs succumb to temptation.

So what do we do? As Jim said, avoid those situations. When we start sharing conversations and thoughts with another woman that should be meant for our wives, that is the beginning of the end. RUN, and run quickly. Surround yourself with men that are not afraid to hold you accountable and kick your butt. Remember your marriage vows, and expand on them. Splitting things 50-50 is old school. Give 75 percent. Live to please your spouse and you will see it come back to you multiplied. Make your No. 1 priority your family; not a new car, not a new boat, not a hunting trip.

Marriage is all about staying strong and guiding your family through the storms that will come. If you say you love your family and kids, why would you risk it all for a night of lust?

The grass is never greener on the other side, guys, as so many of us have painfully found out. Let’s change this world, guys. Let’s do it one man at a time. Love your wife. Be her No. 1 fan.

Give things up for her happiness. Let the boy inside you die, and let the man inside you rise up. Reject passivity, lead courageously. This world depends on it.

Kirk Poser

Town of Waukesha

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