Running of the Cows
That’s right: the Running of the Cows. Forget the silly trolleys or whether or not the city’s drinking water is perpetually screwed up or scheduling fundraisers for the police, you need to get this in the city. Just imagine, cattle running, more likely a slow trotting pace, down State Street as some of the more daring spectators would risk even life and limb to run with the cows.
It would be the event of the century. A representative of every news outlet in the country, and probably the BBC, heck even Al-Jazeera and the Taliban Times, would be present to witness the spectacle for posterity. As someone said “it’d be rolling Mifflin, Halloween and the farmers’ markets, everything [or something] all into one”. Is there any possibly better way for this city to celebrate its Wisconsiness? I think not.
I think Waukesha would be better. The reputation for confusing streets would be part of the charm. And we could have our very own documentary film made. We could have Culver’s sponsor the run. Visitors from all over could stay at our new hotel.
I bet State Representative Bill Kramer would be up for a run. State Rep Rich Zipperer, too. They both seem like good sports. And who wouldn’t pay good money to see Pete Kennedy making the mad dash?