Sunday, December 4th, 2016

Some people might have a different recollection of last night’s events

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What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?–W.C. Fields

Spent last night in a bar, the Calhoun Station to be exact.

We were gathered in numbers to discuss the proposed reduction in the size of the Waukesha County Board. As you’re probably aware, the Waukesha County Board has 35 members, and the Waukesha Taxpayer League has launched a petition and referendum drive to knock the membership down to eleven.

The back room of the Calhoun Station is actually quite nice for political gatherings, although I expected a barroom brawl to break out between the Scott Walker supporters handing out propaganda and the Mark Green supporters. Apparently one of the Walker people cracked a joke about free ethanol at the bar, and the Green people mentioned something about Walker supporting the death penalty for parks directors, and it almost got ugly.

Fortunately, peace prevailed, and I discovered it was my turn to give a speech. I cracked about three jokes about making a political speech in a bar, compared Waukesha County to Jupiter, did a math demonstration by calculating pi, and then wildly waved petitions in the air before having a mock fainting spell. “I’m just dehydrated; someone get me a beer please.”

Did I mention that I’m available for bar mitzvahs, weddings, television & radio appearances, and birthday parties for children?

After being resuscitated, I was able to meet with two members of a local school board running for election and an as-yet undeclared candidate for the state assembly. Mark Block was also there from Americans for Prosperity. Mark and I agreed that Ed Garvey has a secret desire to be a stand-up comedian. After all, it takes a lot of skill to say what he says with a straight face.

Meanwhile, I want to thank the people who have come up to me after both recent speaking events to encourage me to keep writing. I won’t claim to have “fans” (other than my mom) but it is nice to know that people are reading this stuff. And yes, I tell them, that Charlie Sykes is really a nice guy, and he should link to me more often.

I’d like to thank Chris Lufter and the Waukesha Taxpayer League for inviting me to speak. I had a fun time as always. Reducing the size of the county board is an important cause because it re-establishes the relationship between the people and the government. By reducing the number of members, the remaining members will be much more visible to the general public. Increased visibility of our elected officials is always healthy in our democracy, and I hope I helped the cause last night.

And to the two people who kept asking where Owen was, I’m sorry I slashed your tires.

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