Friday, October 28th, 2016

When inviting Senator Barack Obama to your barbecue, remember the Obama does not want conversation while he is eating. You are only allowed to speak to the Obama before and after his meal. Print this entry

When you first enter the Presence of the Obama, is is customary to bow or curtsy. Men: When bowing, bending at the neck is not sufficient. With your hands at your side, bend forward at the waist a sufficient distance that a straight-ahead look will cause you to see the ground or, preferably, the Obama’s […]

New staff members, volunteers and any known associates of the Obama are to be issued red shirts in case the Obama needs to sacrifice an underling to explain an apparent contradiction in the Official Obama Speaks. Remember, there are no contradictions in Obama. The Obama does not change his mind. Either staff misspoke and they […]

When in the Presence of the Obama, it is required that you remove any head and facial covering. Veils, head scarves, hats, yarmulkes, burkhas, are all banned in the Presence of the Obama. Print this entry

As a public service, the Wigderson Library & Pub will offer a daily reminder (Monday through Friday) of the proper protocols when in the Presence of the Obama. Yesterday was part one in the series. When you are in a room with the Obama, it is important that your head at no time should be […]

For those of you that are wondering, kissing Barack Obama’s ring is the normal protocol, but technically it is still optional. Print this entry