Tuesday, November 21st, 2017

Welcome to Scrimasha


City of Waukesha Mayor Jeff Scrima announced today the city will be changing its name. The new name for the city will be Scrimasha.

“Nothing will make this city the number one bestest small vigorously artistic city in the country faster than a good opportunity for rebranding. I figure as long as we’re redoing the entrance signs, we can move together as a family towards a new day in Waukesha. Why not name the city after me?”

When asked about whether the Common Council would approve such a change, Scrima said, “We would be wise to focus on the good and look out for others so that they will look out for us. The name change will be a non-taxpayer funded community-based art project that I will be leading in my private capacity. Our vision is one of servant leadership. I am honored to have this honor to lead this new day going forward. Higher things are more important – the common good, the public trust, human flourishing.

“I will look at the city entrance sign and ask, ‘What’s really important?’ We have to assess reality and look at the strengths that we already have in the city. It’s something I will personally enjoy, but more importantly it’s something the citizens want the city to be. A beacon of what is possible. A beacon of hope and prosperity in a time of uncertainty. By the way, what rebranding?”

Asked what other changes are coming, Scrima said, “I think we should consider replacing East Avenue with a covered bike path, a long tunnel, to Carroll University from the farmer’s market. Then we’re going to close Main Street to vehicle traffic permanently, put interactive sculptures down the middle of it for a new walking tour, and put the gazebo back in the Five Points. Once Jeff Seymour repaints it as a vision of the New Day for Waukesha, everyone will understand the importance of servant leadership. We will then be the number one superbest small arts honor city in the world vigorously.”

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