Sunday, January 20th, 2019

When people take football too seriously


No, I’m not talking about Bob Costas. I’m talking about Fireman Ed of the J-E-T-S. Drew Magary, with some blue language and all-caps commentary, puts the “retirement” of Fireman Ed in perspective.

THE KIDS DID NOT COME TO SEE FIREMAN ED. You’re not Santa Claus. Are you Santa Claus? No, you can’t possibly be, because Santa is awesome and you’re terrible. You’re a guy who yells. You know what I do if my kid wants to hang around a grown man wearing a fireman costume? I NOTIFY THE AREA PAROLE BOARD.

I used to be an addict. Then one evening I found myself trying to figure out which backup running back could rescue my fantasy football team and I realized, “I really have better things to do with my life.”

I love football. I can get sucked into watching any game if it’s on a television near me. I grew up watching Roger Staubach with the Dallas Cowboys, and I loved it when my team beat the Packers repeatedly in the playoffs in the early 1990s. L-O-V-E-D it.

But I’ll bet I’ll watch six, maybe eight games this year, and two of them were on Thanksgiving.There’s an entire interesting world out there, including a 162 game baseball season.

Perhaps “retirement” will put life into a little more perspective for Fireman Ed. And maybe, just maybe, a few less kids will grow up to be annoying drunk jackasses at football stadiums.

I can dream, can’t I?

Check out Jay Mohr’s comments on Jets fans (YouTube), too.

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