Wednesday, May 22nd, 2019

Yard sign wars


*Sigh* I see in the Waukesha Freeman Alderman Terry Thieme asked the police to do something about the illegally placed yard signs supporting Mayor Jeff Scrima. A couple of notes:

1. Yep, Chief Jack will get right on that. Right after he finishes polishing his Key to the City and talking to his lawyer about suing the city for back pay. As Scrima has said, the police are the backbone of the city, or something like that. Sometimes it can be a pain. (I fully confess to taking that quote and putting it in the proper, completely unintended, context.)

2. I have also heard Scrima supporters are putting signs on properties where they don’t belong. Not sure why the property owners don’t just take them down or paint funny faces on them.

3. If Scrima supporters are putting yard signs in places where they are not supposed to put them, that means they have run out of places where they can put the signs. Or the few “overenthusiastic” volunteers Scrima has are the only volunteers he has.

4. Don’t worry. Be happy. Yard signs don’t vote. In fact, yard signs serve very little purpose in a campaign except to make your proud supporters appear more proud and more numerous than your opponents’ supporters. It’s not true, but at least you feel that way when you put up a yard sign.

5. Remember, if you don’t put up a yard sign supporting your favorite candidate, people will probably write-in LeafGuard or Andersen Windows on their ballots.

6. Yard signs are meant to be stolen. If it wasn’t for the cold weather, I would probably be hearing about yard signs disappearing all over the city. By the way, very clever of Thieme to choose white camouflage for his yard signs so they blend in with the snow. Hard to steal those yard signs.

7. I notice Scrima stopped spray painting his campaign logo on the snow and polluting the environment for his campaign. He probably made the decision right after the next snow storm. Or perhaps it was after a local dog decided the snow sign needed more color.

8. Campaign workers and volunteers have nothing else better to do than to police other campaigns’ yard signs, repair and replace their own campaign yard signs, and field calls about stolen yard signs. In fact, campaigns should spend all their time worrying about yard signs instead of worrying about things like mail, phones, lit drops, and door-to-door efforts. You know, actual voter contact? It’s highly overrated.

9. It’s always great to see the vacant lots, vacant storefronts and empty fields supporting candidates.

10. You know who has the best yard sign? Mayor McCheese.

mayor mccheese

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