Saturday, August 24th, 2019

Milwaukee County Sheriff David Clarke showed up for work on Friday, the sheriff’s office announced on April 1. “It was a little odd seeing him in person,” said Fran McLaughlin, the spokesman for the Milwaukee County Sheriff’s Department. “He looks taller on tv.” McLaughlin said that Clarke’s rare appearance caused a bit of a stir at […]

Milwaukee Mayor Tom Barrett announced today, April 1, that due to the high volume of homicides expected on the North Side of Milwaukee this summer, the Department of Public Works (DPW) will be running special carts down the city streets to collect the bodies. The service will run May 1 through September 1, 2017. “While […]

AFD News – April 1, 2016 – Nobody is talking this morning about what happened on the campaign bus as it was parked overnight in the hotel parking lot in Jerry, WI. At least, not on the record. The campaign radio, a large, 1980s style boom box belonging to Texas Senator Ted Cruz, was mysteriously destroyed. […]

AFD NEWS – April 1, 2016 – While Ohio Governor John Kasich rehearsed a campaign speech for a townhall gathering in Bruesly, WI, one of the governor’s flailing arms caught his speechwriter, Orel Pablume, in the shoulder. According to witnesses, Pablum was knocked to the ground with the force of the blow. Emergency personnel, often onsite […]

AFD NEWS Wisconsin – Donald Trump announced this morning, April 1, 2016, that, if elected president, he will build an additional wall around Roswell, NM. “We need to secure our borders. This is very important. We’re going to build a wall. It will be a very big wall. We bigly need this for our security. We […]

I will not be posting any April Fools joke posts tomorrow. I hate to end the annual tradition but it’s too close to a presidential primary election, there’s too much focus on Wisconsin, and I really don’t want to spend my weekend explaining a parody blog post that fooled a Chinese news agency. Besides, I […]

MILWAUKEE – AFD News – Marquette University will announce today that they will no longer be a Catholic university. In a twenty-seven line press release issued overnight, Marquette University President Michael Lovell announced a press conference for later today, April 1st, when Marquette’s future will be discussed. In the press release, Lowell gave as a […]

Madison – AFD News – Less than a week before Election Day, Madison Mayor Paul Soglin made a startling admission in an exclusive interview with AFD News. Soglin said, “I am sick and tired of the whiny protesters. Sick, sick, sick. Why don’t all of the stupid hippies just move to Portland?” For Soglin, the […]

SHOREWOOD – AFD NEWS – UW-Milwaukee Chancellor Mark “Show me the” Mone is not looking forward to the proposed cuts to the UW System. In an interview with AFD News service yesterday, Mone said the proposed cuts will be devastating to his campus. “For one thing, some of our professors will actually have to work […]

MILWAUKEE – AFD News- In a late afternoon press conference Tuesday, Milwaukee Mayor Tom Barrett confirmed the purchase of a new carriage for the Milwaukee Streetcar system. The Walt Disney World Monorail Mark IV Red, used in the 1970s, will be modified to fit the fixed rail system being built in Milwaukee. “I got it […]