Friday, October 21st, 2016

You never forget your first


Belle at Leaning Blue just did her taxes all by herself for the first time, using a computer program. (Yeah, you never forget your first IRS audit either.)

Welcome Belle to the world of looking at the bottom line. You have just taken the first step towards becoming a Conservative. At first you’re happy because you’re owed a refund, but then you realize that for an entire year you loaned the government money interest free so they could put gas in Peg Lautenschlager’s car. You did it in installments, and you’ll never get that money’s earning potential back. (Next year, decrease your withholding and stick the money in your 401k or a mutual fund. Contact your HR representative now.)

Step two is when you look at the money you were actually “paid” and what the government took out of it. Wow, that’s an ugly number. Almost enough to make you join the Posse Comitatus. Just think what you could have done with that money. Now think what the government did with that money. Now take some Mylanta or some other antacid.

Okay, you can deal with it, right? That is, until you buy a house and pay the property taxes and fees on that. And then you realize the amount you pay in sales taxes when you buy a new car. And then you start thinking about the other sales taxes you pay, and the fees, and every other way government sucks your money that you earned with your labor from you. Soon you’ll find yourself asking, why am I paying all this money?

That first time you’re in the voting booth filling in the line for a Conservative candidate who campaigned to lower taxes, I hope you remember this day.

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