Monday, August 26th, 2019

Kohl to endorse Hovde for Senate


Democratic Senator Herb Kohl is crossing party lines today to endorse Republican candidate Eric Hovde for Senate. Kohl admitted that the endorsement of a possible successor from another party was highly unusual.

“The other day I was trying to express solidarity with my players and I told them, ‘Black or white, tall or short, Jewish, Christian or whatever, we’re all really, really rich.”

“We’re the one percent, I told them, and the one percent sticks together and plays like a team.”

“That’s when I realized that we must rise above party labels and worry about more important things. I know what it’s like to be really, really rich. I know the challenges a really wealthy person faces everyday. It takes someone special to be able to live with more money than a Kennedy, and that’s why I’m endorsing Eric Hovde for Senate.”

When asked if he was worried about criticism from members of his own party for his endorsement solely based upon Hovde’s wealth, Kohl replied, “Were they paying attention when I ran in 1988? The whole point of my campaign was that I was rich. Rich enough to buy a senate seat without anybody else’s money. What did they think, ‘Nobody’s senator but yours’ meant?”

Kohl added, “Hovde is just that sort of candidate. He’s rich enough to buy a senate seat even in Illinois. That’s what is important. It doesn’t matter whether someone is black or white or Hispanic, what matters is whether they will fit in with all the other millionaires in the senate.”

Asked if he considered endorsing one of the candidates with less personal wealth like Congressman Tammy Baldwin or Assembly Speaker Jeff Fitzgerald, Kohl replied, “I waited until after the Megamillions drawing to see if anyone else in Wisconsin became really rich like me. Nobody in Wisconsin won, so I’m limited to endorsing Hovde. I mean, [former Governor] Tommy [Thompson] has made some money, but Eric and I can buy him several times. I think other people have. And Neumann? Can he even afford to buy a home he builds?”

The press conference was held at the Kohl Center in Madison and got off to an awkward start with the senator’s opening remarks. “So here we are at a basketball arena I built. I’m glad I won’t have to build another one of these.”

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