Tuesday, July 16th, 2019

Marquette University no longer Catholic, name change expected


MILWAUKEE – AFD News – Marquette University will announce today that they will no longer be a Catholic university. In a twenty-seven line press release issued overnight, Marquette University President Michael Lovell announced a press conference for later today, April 1st, when Marquette’s future will be discussed.

In the press release, Lowell gave as a reason for the change, “We can no longer keep up the facade. We haven’t been teaching ‘Catholic’ values for some time, so why keep up the pretense? We look forward to embracing a new era of diversity. As part of this new diversity, we are going to challenge ourselves to embracing a singular new campus culture where there will be no room for the oppressive norms of Catholicism.”

Marquette is also expected to announce a plan for changing the university’s name. In the press release, Lowell said, “The name Marquette has a number of negative connotations with which we feel the student body may be uncomfortable, or even offended. Father Marquette was not respecting of indigenous people’s beliefs when he brought a white privileged patriarchal belief to the area later called Wisconsin. His travels through the lands of Native Americans would later inspire white European oppression in what we now call Wisconsin.”

A committee is expected to be formed to pick a new name for Marquette University. However, insiders are suggesting “Gold University” will probably be used in the interim.

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